Hillary Clinton’s Campaign Debt Mysteriously Paid Off Before Benghazi Testimony

(PP)- One day before her much anticipated testimony before both houses of Congress, Secretary of State Hillary Rodham Clinton has surprisingly paid off the outstanding debt from her 2008 presidential campaign.

Unofficial campaign finance reports filed late Tuesday show Clinton’s campaign made payments of $10,800,000 on January 22nd to a loan shark working for her former adviser and middle weight contender Alessandro Petacchi. That accounted for the last part of the debt going back to her losing primary campaign against Barack Hussein Obama.

Clinton had owed vendors about $12 million at the end of June 2008, and had only paid off $1.2 million over the past four years. Insiders close to the Secretary of State believed that the very large final payment had nothing to do with the former First Lady’s testimony before Congress on Wednesday.

“We are not yet sure were all the cash came from,” said a Hillary 2008 campaign aide. “Everyone here is just glad that the debt is retired so we can finally move on and get new jobs. The past four years we’ve only made minimum wage, and trying to sell old Hillary for President bumper stickers is useless.”

As a Cabinet member, Clinton faced strict fundraising restrictions to eliminate her debt but someone, perhaps a wealthy benefactor or a secret government slush fund, could pay the debt on her behalf.

Former President Bill Clinton sent a fundraising email to old friends in his little black book late November, begging for their assistance in retiring his wife’s huge debt. The campaign raised only $108  in the last quarter of 2012…. an all time record low.

Mrs, Clinton, who was reported to be under heavy protective security before her Congressional hearings on Wednesday, may have been offered a last minute contribution by an anonymous party intensely interested in her potentially damaging testimony.

“We have been monitoring large cash transactions through the federal reserve bank,” said a Palookaville Post mail room attendant. “The only transaction near $10 million was from the Heinz Foods Corporation to the John Kerry for Secretary of State petty cash account. We know he’s richer than Romney, but seriously…. that’s a lot of petty cash.”

Neither Senator John Fitzgerald Kerry, Teresa Heinz Ward or Hines Ward were available for comment.

The Palookaville Post has learned of a secret signal Hillary is to give to Democrats who need to know if she is going to testify truthfully in Wednesday’s hearings or if she will be evasive and cover up for her friends on the radical left. If Hillary wears glasses during her testimony, that gives Democrats the all clear signal, and they can return to writing pork barrel spending bills instead of catching the first flight back to Havana, Chicago or Detroit. If she does not wear glasses, some of her friends are going to jail.

“Segretti”